Summer

I said I would Blog 52 times this year and right now I can’t remember the last blog I posted. It’s amazing how life gets in the way of your goals!

Today I decided that I would take one hour just to go outside and enjoy my surroundings. This is not something I get to do very often. Typically when I am outside I am mowing, or weeding or cleaning the beach or something that is considered work. And although I don’t mind doing those things, it is not just sitting around and doing nothing.

So I went out and yes I did rake the sand a little and got rid of the algae, but I also stood at the water’s edge and watched the ripples from the summer breeze and the bugs and birds that dipped into the water.

I saw birds soaring and beautiful puffy clouds and marveled at the blue sky. I laid on my stomach on the dock and watched little schools of fish swimming around. I waited patiently for a big fish to come and scare them, but none came.

I watched my dog Lucy become annoyed with the scores of dragonflies buzzing around her. She finally laid down and stared at me.

And as I sat there looking at my surroundings, I realized I am at peace. Probably only for this very brief moment in my life; but still it is something that I should really take notice of.

It’s not that I don’t miss Terry any less than I did two months ago, but that I know that I am comfortable in my own skin and I am going to be OK without him. I am amazed that it’s alright for me to just be by myself and not have to worry about another human day in and day out.

And yes, I would trade it all in for Terry to be alive; but it wasn’t fair to him, so I have to give up and let go and let life be life and enjoy mine.

I guess this is what summer is all about. Making time to find a little peace.

 

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2 Comments

Filed under Awareness

2 responses to “Summer

  1. Oh I love this. We all should stop, look around, enjoy and be grateful. Thank you for the reminder.

  2. Cindy Deeter

    Very poignant, Julie. Peace is an elusive angel. We need to stop and embrace her when she shows her lovely face.

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